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• THE DAILY MEME
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• “The Spite House” in Alexandria, Virginia

…because, I relate to everything via music. Music is such a part of who I am, that I rarely hear something that doesn’t instantly have meaning…

And, because this is his ring tone on my cell phone…

I’m not sure what to do. Should I pursue? Should I stay where I am (in my comfort zone) with him? Should I just go with the flow? How do I move on when he has my heart in his grip like he does? If nothing is going to come of this, then yeah, I want to move on. Find someone. Build a new life. But I don’t know how…

Is it possible that maybe, possibly, someone will come along and.. oh, I don’t know. What has my mind going like this? Possibly because, someone that I know that I could be interested in has asked me out. Possibly. I don’t feel like I am emotionally available. However, I said yes. Because I don’t want to be bound to someone that doesn’t want to be with me.

I’m rambling. I’m sorry. Everywhere I turn lately it seems someone is there, interested in me - it’s so insane. Is it because I am almost divorced? It’s strange. The thing is, it’s kind of nice. But then, it also scares the living shit out of me because as much as I want to move forward in this life and find someone, I just know I’m not there yet…

snagged from Charming & Delightful
This is dead on accurate… well, except the part about being patient…

(and I’m out of things to blog about - taking a quiet day)

Sorry for the double post, but HE JUST CALLED! Dennis.just.called.

Dennis and Me - 1993 - My Senior Prom

Two weeks, and I have been aching to hear his voice… oh, I’m so SO so happy right now I have tears rolling down my face. I almost didn’t answer the call, it was a strange number - but everytime I get a strange number in the last two weeks, I think “It could be him…” and it never is. Boy, am I glad I answered this call. I would have been so mad at myself if I had heard his voice on my voicemail!

When I answered he says, in his calm, casual way “Hey, what are you doin?” and I slapped my hand over my face (like I haven’t talked to him in ten years) and felt like someone knocked the wind out of me and in a barely audible voice said “Who is this?”

Me and Dennis - July, 2006 - @ a Friend’s Birthday Luau

He knows me so well. I miss that so much about him. He laughed at me and said “C’mon Heather, who do you THINK it is?” and that’s the point where I started blabbering like a fool about how much I’ve missed him and how GOOD it was to hear his voice. He continued to laugh at me a little, but he threw in just enough (”I miss you, too” and “What, did you think I wouldn’t call?”) little things like that, things that make him HIM to make me smile more than I have in the last two weeks. And cry just as much, too.

Dennis & Me - November 2008, a month ago - LSU/BAMA Game

He gets to have visitors next weekend, and could be home by Christmas. Oh, how I can’t wait to SEE him!!

There isn’t a man in this town that stands a chance with me after that phone call. Poor men. They have no clue my heart is taken.

My cup runneth over.

All I Want For Christmas