Seriously. What in the piss is wrong with me?

I have never in my 34 years known someone that I just.can’t.say.no.to.

I can’t say no to him.

Why?

I already know, I fell for him. I feel it everytime I hear his voice, and everytime I see his face. But I have dealt with it and I am trying with all my might to move forward.

It doesn’t take much. A phone call. And I’m gone – hook, line and sinker.

He says “I want to see you”. And I fall all over again. Everytime.

I don’t want it to be that way, but I think the truth is – I really just want to be with him. We get along so well – we always did. We have fun together, we laugh a lot, and there’s a lot of passion there. It’s on fire, even still. I don’t mean that… I mean, the oomph that most relationships are missing. It’s there, and it’s sizzlin.

Oh God. I don’t even know what I’m trying to say. Or am I trying to make an excuse for the fact that he just left my house? Son of a bitch!

I’m weak. I’m a weak, pathetic girl with stars in her eyes over some silly boy. Seriously. That’s not someone I ever thought I’d be.