I think I am officially deconstructing. It’s day 3. You should know “of what” by now… Day 3 of him being gone, and of my 31 day blogging streak - if we’re all lucky. (Yeah, because what would you DO with your time if I didn’t blog?)

Today was a horrific day for those who live under the same roof as me. I was a complete and total bitch, I was pissed off at the world, and I couldn’t figure out WHY. And all I wanted to do was CRY. Finally my friend pointed out to me that I was SO pms’ing. She’s right. I just wasn’t paying attention, and it freaked me out a little that I was so over the top angry. I’m sure everything else just adds to it and makes it worse, but it’s nice to know it’s generating from somewhere real, and somewhere temporary

I’m at least starting to make somewhat of an effort to distract myself from the chaos in my life (or in my head)… I took N tonight to the local church to see Santa & Mrs. Claus and get a gift. We go every year, and every year we get there ON TIME and wait in line for over an hour. Someday, I’ll get there early….,

He never ceases to amaze me. He will tell me, and everyone else all about the things he wants for Christmas. But when he sees Santa, it’s a different story, and it’s my job to listen closely…. because he always, always tells Santa something that he hasn’t told ANYONE else that he wants for Christmas. This year, he told Santa he wanted some “Thumb War Maskes” (say it with me - maskess). I have no clue what that is, but I will be googling it shortly.

I tried to wait for the kid in the background to get out of the way, but you know what? I was so incredibly sick of the kids in line BEHIND us that I just wanted to get the F out of there. Seriously. You don’t even want me to begin to share with you the things that went through my mind about THAT family for the entire hour I was in line in front of them.

So, N got to pick his own gift and he picked a 100 piece Naruto puzzle. He has loved puzzles ever since I can remember, and he’s really good at them. I’m not just saying that because I’m his mom, he’s a puzzle puttin’ together FOOL!

So anyway, after the long day of PMS, being pissed off, and dealing with the inbred family behind me.. I got a daiquiri on the way home. What the hell. Drive thru daiquiri shops are a luxury of living in southern Louisiana, and I take advantage of them from time to time. When I got home, to my delight, my sister was mixing her own White Russians… and then decided to show me how well she bartends…. her “flare”….  (which is really quite funny at this very moment, considering she just shattered a glass on the countertop…)

So now, I’m just hanging with Donna (the one throwing around the vodka bottle above) and getting some strange comments from that one guy I posted about before… and at that time, I was sure I’d never go there again. But you know what? I went into that blind. I’m well aware of what the outcome would be should I choose to go there again, and the truth of the matter is… I could use the distraction. And I might go there again. Just because I can. Or maybe that’s the “russian” in me talking

And yeah, my theme song tonight… Lose My Head by Courtney Jaye