It’s hard to believe it’s already been 7 years. The time has gone by so fast, yet I remember the horror of this day as if it were yesterday. We (my future ex-husband and I) lived one block outside of the Naval base in Virginia. He was deployed, and I was 3 months pregnant with N. Home alone, no family. I recall vividly rolling over in the bed, almost as if someone told me to, and looking at the TV. For a moment, I thought a movie was on, but that didn’t last long because if you know me, you know I fall asleep watching some random news channel… Once I realized this was real, and live… I jumped to the foot of the bed, and unmuted the TV… Apparently I had just missed the first plane. I remember the terror and fear in the voices of the broadcasters, the confusion in their eyes. I was beyond terrified. I sat in horror and watched, and listened…

Then out of nowhere, there came another plane. I watched it as it happened. I don’t think I have ever been more paralyzed by fear than I was at that moment. To this day, I still cannot comprehend the loss that our country, our fellow Americans, everyday people, lost in that moment. I just can’t wrap my head around it, it’s too much for my little brain to decipher.

Then I heard sirens, and I ran to the window, and saw the bomb squad (or whatever they are called, I don’t remember exactly) in their black box come flying out of the naval base. This nearly sent me over the edge. There was talk of other possible targets, and it was then that I became afraid for my own safety, and the safety of my unborn child. Because you see, we lived right on top of the largest Naval base on the East coast. Then in the midst of my panic, I realized there was NO WAY I was going to be able to get anyone on the phone to talk me through this. My husband was due home the next day, and late that night I got a phone call from him. I remember that he told me I couldn’t tell him anything, so don’t, but he asked me how serious it was… he said he didn’t know where they were going, but they were going somewher,e and they were going fast. The aircraft carrier he was on was the first in NY Harbor. Even once they were there, they had no idea how huge this attack was. I was very angry about that. I was angry that he was put out there to protect and defend, and was not even informed of what they were up against.

That’s just my recollection of September 11, 2001. I don’t remember that story every year, because it’s quite insignificant. It’s only the terror that struck our country that day that causes me to remember details, otherwise it would just have been another day in my life.

Now, I spend each year on this day quite emotional. My heart aches for everyone whose lives were touched on a personal level by these terrorist attacks. I cannot even begin to describe the ache. I hope everyone remembers. And says a prayer for those left behind.

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